UNC Academic Scandal Rocking the Far East; Cal Possible Replacement

Golden Bear taking over the Rams in the Far East?

The Trichotillomanicas of the Far East are reportedly reviewing their relationship with the University of North Carolina amid rising concerns regarding academic integrity of some of UNC's student-athletes.  General Far East, in a rare public interview conducted by the Far East Times reporter Miao Mi Mao in late March and published in this weekend's edition, admitted that the Far East club is having an internal dialogue regarding their long-standing partnership with UNC and a possible switch of school affiliation across the country to the University of California, Berkeley.  UNC and the Trichs historically had a relationship in which the Far East team maintained the so-called Tarheel slot on their roster, designated for Chapel Hill products in the NFL.  The Trichs didn't maintain a roster spot for former UNC athletes this past season. 

NCAA is investigating the African Studies department at Chapel Hill following allegations surfaced about how student-athletes, including some former football and basketball players that went on to become professionals, received preferential academic treatment.  Just recently the Benedictus Chronicle published a photo of a one-paragraph essay supposedly written by a student-athlete about Rosa Parks that received a B grade, which drew much criticism to the prestigious Southern state university.  The General apparently feels personally slighted about TY Hilton faking his academic credential and faults that on UNC athletic department.  

Cal is a natural second choice for General Far East.  He attended classes at Cal during his stay in the west coast.  In the interview with Mao, he revealed that former NFL punter Nick Harris, who hasn't played in the league since 2012 season, was his classmate in Race and Ethnicity in the U.S. course in the summer of 2000.  "Sort of a doosh, but was also pretty intelligent.  He was one of the more vocal of the 15 or so members of the seminar-course.  I'm certain he did his own work, he certainly was intelligent enough to write the 15 or so pages that we had to write as the final report.  He spoke that way.  I also saw Deltha O'neal around the campus library often during that summer, shouldering a back pack and books in hand.  He had girls following, but I'm sorry to say, the girls following looked less intelligent than Deltha.  And they were both drafted by the Broncos.  That says something.

"That Ethnic Studies class at Berkeley was serious.  The whole department was serious.  It was the Berkeley of Berkeley.  The class was taught by a white PhD candidate from West Hollywood who admired Mumia Abu Jamal and a black bald-head chick from DC.  Their office hours were held at a coffee shop on Telegraph Avenue.  Telegraph Ave. is the counter culture Mecca.  Franklin Street is Main Street USA."

Deltha O'neal was Broncos#24 before Champ Bailey arrived

The General doesn't have any personal tie to Chapel Hill despite his publicly stated love for UNC's basketball program.  He admitted to Mao that, since John Bunting, he stopped following UNC football although he still hates Mack Brown for leaving UNC for Texas.  "Bunting is a baseball tactic, a delicate art so to speak.  Not for beastly football."

The shift may have started last season, the first time the Trichs didn't carry a former Tarheel on their roster.  It's notable that Cal seemingly has more fantasy stars than UNC, with the likes of DeSean Jackson and Aaron Rodgers having the East Bay school as their alma mater.  Keenan Allen, who was one of the General's best mid-season acquisition in 2013, is another solid Cal product whose future looks bright in the NFL.  Former Tarheels in the league include the likes of Hakeem Nicks and Julius Peppers, who both represented the school as members of the Far East club in the past.  Most of former Tarheels in the NFL are, like the aforementioned two, in declining stage of their careers or still too young for fantasy relevancy.  Gio Bernard is the most promising up-and-coming Chapel Hill product but is a possible keeper target by the GrossmanSachs.

DeSean reprezent

Of course, it's April and any public statement on personnel decisions should be taken with a grain of salt.