12. Phat Girlz (0-7) (last week 12)
We get it. The Girlz don't want to play this year. But just a reminder that the highest draft pick goes to the winner of the consolation tournament, not the worst regular season record. Meaning if they lose every last game they'll end up with a decidedly mediocre sixth pick in next year's draft.
Next Week - Trichs - At this point if the Girlz win, we'll chalk it up to an accident. They haven't set a lineup in weeks.
11. Cincinnati Dangles (2-5) (last week 10) -
Everybody was cheering for the Dangles to take out the mighty Raiders this week. But they failed to set their line-up and missed out on the Tuskens lowest score of the year. Losing ace kicker Janikowski won't help matters. The Dangles have been hesitant to go to the wire this year, now they've got too many holes not to. Also of note, the Dangles have the tough-luck award under wraps, with a more than 100 pt lead on the points against column.
Next Week - Sachs - Byes for Matty Ice and Jennings make this an up hill battle. If they fill the lineup they'll have a chance though.
10. dETHRONED_kING (2-4-1) - (last week 11)Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. Tebow. The kING should savor a long draught of b34st this week, after dropping 145 on the Ferries. Their best outing of the season couldn't have come at a more crucial moment. Tebow won't play Miami every week. But if Foster has found his groove (40 btw) then watch out. This team is every bit as dangerous as pre-season rankings called them. The Monarch probably needs a bit of help in the form of chaos in the wildcard race - in addition to helping themselves to several key upsets.
9 . Trichotillomaniacs (3-4) (last week T. 8) -
Chaos in the Far-East appears to be taking a toll on the Hair-Pullers as they got squashed in their hardest bye-week. Probably the best news for the Trichs is that Colston appears to have returned to full WR1 form. While the most disappointing news has to be the steady decline of Rivers into QB3 mediocrity. Their schedule is friendly to a playoff run, but they'll have to nail down wins where they can get them.
Next Week - PG - a softer opponent is just what the Trichs need to get them back in Natty Dread mode. Frank the Tank could be in for another 100 yard game against Cleveland, and with Nicks back against Miami this should be a cake-walk.
8. Vixkennel.com (3-4) (last week T.8 ) -
The Dawgs stopped the bleeding this week against the hapless Girlz. But Front house moves seem to have sold the carpet from beneath their feet. Gone is Ray Rice, one of the top backs in the league. Here is Matt Stafford - a QB who throws to the best wide receiver in the league. Meanwhile the R-burger continued his on-again off-again season with a resounding 26 against the Cardinals. Forte will struggle to carry the load unless the Champ opens his purse and starts raining cash on the wire.
Next Week - TTM - it's a particularly bad week for VIx on the bye. So bad, they may have to drop a starter or two to field a full team. But, TTM's unlikely running attack will be severely hobbled. This could be a fair, but low-scoring fight.
T 6. GrossmanSachs (4-3) (last week T. 5)
The Bankers bottomed out against the Nauts in their week-without-Vick. But an out of division loss isn't the worst thing in the world. Greene's progress is encouraging, although Mendy's apparent regression is worrying. The team has lived and died by Vick and AJ Green this year, so we'll be able to take a more accurate temperature when they return.
Next Week - Dangles - The Sachs stay in the Milesian with a winnable one against the Dangles. They need it to stay in the Eleatic race, so expect the Bankers to pull out all the stops here.
T. 6. SF Ferries (4-3) (last week 3) -
Cam won the SEC QB battle but the Ferries dropped a shocker to the King. They may be having trouble adjusting to the West Coast lifestyle, because they left a few spots vacant (out of character for this franchise). Then again, voting against themselves, they may have had little motivation to come out the victor here. The Ferries have been the big winners before in the Gulag. Hillis' contract/injury situation have turned into a full-blown train wreck for this squad. So air-power may be the major thrust of the offense here (sooner they get Andre Johnson back, then better).
Next Week -The Ferries will face a Raiders squad without Run DMC and try to do the rest of the league a favor by handing them a L.
T. 4. Tusken Raiders (5-2) (last week T. 6) -
Who's scary this Halloween? The Tuskens. They faced up to their Brady-bye and pulled out another victory. Somehow, all of this is without CJ2k. Run DMC's injury is worrying, but with his bye coming up anyway, they'll catch a break there in all likelihood. The Tuskens got away with a win in a game where their IDP and kicker easily outscored the rest of their team, true the Pats bye and McFadden's injury had most to do with that. But a lucky win puts them in the thick of the playoff contenders, still undefeated in the Milesian.
Next Week - Ferries - Another in division for the Tuskens, without Run DMC they may be vulnerable a legitimately high-ceiling Ferries team, but with Brady likely raking the Giants secondary they'll be in this one regardless.
T. 4. Taking Tiger Mountain (5-2) (Last Week T. 6) -
They're already calling it the "Miracle on Tiger Mountain". The first D/ST drafted this year came up big again (aided by the Curse of Ray Rice™). The Tigers might have got the worst of the injury bug, and face a big downgrade in their run game. Willis McGahee and Beanie Wells both down in the same day. What's more a combined 8 points from them in what could be their last performance in a while left TigerMountain grasping at straws all weekend. The blowout victories of the first four weeks seem very far away indeed, and the Tiger fans are already in open revolt over their failure to make any significant pick-ups during the fat times to prepare for the inevitable famine. V-Jax got Revis'd, the Tigers should hope that's all that was wrong there. Oh and by the way Brees had a nice bounce back game throwing 5 TDs.
-They're already calling it the "Miracle on Tiger Mountain". The first D/ST drafted this year came up big again (aided by the Curse of Ray Rice™). The Tigers might have got the worst of the injury bug, and face a big downgrade in their run game. Willis McGahee and Beanie Wells both down in the same day. What's more a combined 8 points from them in what could be their last performance in a while left TigerMountain grasping at straws all weekend. The blowout victories of the first four weeks seem very far away indeed, and the Tiger fans are already in open revolt over their failure to make any significant pick-ups during the fat times to prepare for the inevitable famine. V-Jax got Revis'd, the Tigers should hope that's all that was wrong there. Oh and by the way Brees had a nice bounce back game throwing 5 TDs.
Next Week - Vix - The Tigers need this one in the worst way. Their schedule from here on in is chock-a-block with serious opponents. After already dropping one the Eleatic division, the Tigers must win or hand the division to Pelicans outright.
3. BldgDwllngThnkng (3-3-1) - (last week T. 1)-
The Monday Night heroics of TTM's squad aside, the real story was in the front office where the Heideggerians bought some serious mojo off the wire, and made the first blockbuster trade of the year to secure their elite status. With Rice, F-Jax, Forte & Murray in their stable they're far and away the deepest ground game in the league. Take Rice's terrible Monday night as you will - as J-ville's motivated Run-D, as a bad night, or as punishment from the Godz. While we still think they might regret leaving Romo without a serious back-up, it's just a matter of time until Austin lights up the league (whoever's throwing to him).
Next Week - Pelicans - Honestly, take a look at BDT's line-up and take a look at their schedule and ask yourself if they're going to loose a game the rest of the year. They might not, but after an emotional loss Monday they might need some help to get back in the Milesian race. They'll start off lucky catching the Pelicans while they're missing Superman Rodgers.
Zeus' thunderbolt stays with the longest winning streak at 5 after the Nauts handled the Bankers in a low-scorer in Week 7. It was the Nauts lowest score of the year, and still not too shabby for a bye week. Hopefully, Blount will be back after his bye, since Graham got knocked out. AP is the guts of this franchise, so signs of life from Minnesota are a boost for their playoff ambitions. If Stafford's arm starts to become a question, Calvin's epic adventure could get downgraded. There's no other team in the league whose fortunes are still riding so directly on the continued health of their keepers.
1. The Pelican Brief (5-2) (last week T. 1) -
The Legal Thrillers continue to excite with a big win over the Trichs. Rodgers continued to dominate, and his fellow keeper Gates returned to form, which could be the final piece of the Pelican puzzle. A perfect 4-0 in the Eleatic, the division is now theirs to lose (although they'll play TTM in the regular season finale). They're the top scorer in the league and still increasing their lead. With little cash in the kitty the Pelicans will have to make some tough decisions about lineups in the coming weeks. The #1 ranking has been a target so far this year, and no one has worn the mantle for long.
Next Week - BDT - in a truly premier match-up against a bitter rival, the Pelicans will have to go without Rodgers. Since they don't keep another QB on the roster, that means they'll have to wade in the shallow end of the QB pool to fish one out. It could be a long day for the Dirty Birds, but with Welker and Gates both in easy match-ups, don't count them out
Next Week - BDT - in a truly premier match-up against a bitter rival, the Pelicans will have to go without Rodgers. Since they don't keep another QB on the roster, that means they'll have to wade in the shallow end of the QB pool to fish one out. It could be a long day for the Dirty Birds, but with Welker and Gates both in easy match-ups, don't count them out
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