PSAS Open Forum #occupyPR

Sunday, April 21, 2013

PSAS: Diztroyed by Dizign

Sources inside the commissioner's office are looking into allegations of illegal football betting levied against the HomeSpunNeckBloodz franchise after the recent leaking of a disturbing surveillance video. If the allegations prove to be true, it could have a catastrophic effect on the PSAS, which above all, has always been known for its integrity and adherence to a strict honor code.

It is suspected that the owner of HomeSpunNeckBloodz whet his appetite for gambling in Las Vegas by betting on Panda Tree Climbing Races. Betting on PTCRs is allowed under the league's Asian-American Friendly Furry Initiative, and is a favorite pastime of many league owners. 

 The smiling, mentally deranged Panda on the left is named Amerikah, and it always loses.

After the owner of HomeSpunNeckBloodz lost all his money on the Pandas, he had reached #CasinoBuddhismNirvana. He reportedly walked the Vegas strip without a dollar in his pocket or a worry in his head. Sadly, his blissful poverty would not last, as he was abruptly kicked in the testicles by a child known only as Mr. Meow Kush. Anyone who is kicked in the testicles in the Clark County, NV is awarded 20 dollars by the state.

 This man was not only the first to monetize getting kicked in nuts, he also acts as the invisible hand controlling the market, by setting prices and curbing inflation.

It is believed that 10 of the dollars awarded to the victim were lost in the pursuit of elusive dragon orbz, while the other ten was possibly placed on a football game. The owner of HomeSpunNeckBloodz contends that the ten dollars was placed on a three-way parlay of baseball games, which while being frowned upon, would not pose any serious threat to the future of the league as nobody ever remembers the PSAS has an MLB division. League experts are nearly done researching the validity of HomeSpunNeckBloodz claims. The cards are definitely stacked against the HomeSpunNeckBloodz as it seems very difficult to prove that the Houston Astros are indeed a baseball franchise.

Mr. Meow Kush was last seen taking a nap and couldn't be reached for comment.

The surveillance video clearly shows other PSAS owners were in Las Vegas at the time of the reported gambling. The other owners have been silent thus far on any role they may have played in any gambling/rat killing activities. If you have any information on the activities of the #VegasSix, please contact league authorities immediately. If anyone outside of the league suspects such nefarious conduct is accepted by league authorities, the league's charter could be pulled by the Pre-Socractic board.

If you see this man, do not ask him if he has any dragon orbz, unless you want to hear a very sad story. 

Unfortunately, since the video's release, hundreds of copycats and remixes have appeared on the web. Many think this is an attempt to muddy the waters of the investigation, which would explain why over 87% of the videos can be traced directly to the television department of New York University. The following video is just one of the iterations (one of the growing number of #AstrosTroother videos theorizing that the Houston Astros do in fact competitively play professional baseball). In this particular video, the Astros are leading the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim in the Outfield by one run with two outs in the bottom of the ninth inning.