2nd Annual PSAS Awards Show

@9 pm EST

Join us as we toast Sunday's Championship Game and remember the year that was!

2009: BDT narrowly defeating Garrett for the Legacy Award for Titrative Excellence

Excellence in Blogging: "Eli Developing Rapport with Vikings DBs"

The Most Excellent Blogging Association announced today that it has awarded Prescott Bush IV a "Seal of Excellence" for his blog post entitled "Eli Developing Rapport with Vikings DBs." The post was published on Monday October 22nd and quickly made the rounds on various social networks.  Blogging Association President John Stanley had this to say:

"Bush's post was just an all around excellent blog post!  I got on the phone right away with our awards department and had the 'Seal of Excellence' issued.  The post is funny because it's written as if Eli Manning considers the Vikings DBs to be Giants receivers.  What a hilarious concept!"

Prescott Bush IV's blog post from Monday October 22nd.

Prescott Bush IV (interim CEO of Grossman Sachs) took the time to record an acceptance speech:

Download your own seal and make someone's day!!!

Regular Season Awards

Reviving an ancient tradition of former Commissioner psychdog, this year we welcome you to the PSAS 2013 Awards Ceremony.

Dorfman Memorial Maximum Titration Award - BldgDw3ll1ngTh1nk1ng (66)

-The Chico Bandits had  21 more roster moves than their nearest competitor, in keeping with a long line of BDT titrating.  Only four players took the whole ride with BDT this year and fittingly they were four of their top five picks. Bryant, Rice, Chicago and Amendola. Mixed in there were four trades which pulled in mercurial producers Romo, Deangelo and T.Y.  




Scott Boras Client Spend-down Award - HSNB (Brandon Jacobs $87)

-The Cyclotron tried to turn their season around with a big bid on Jacobs who threw down a 27 on SNF in week 6, unfortunately he didn't play the next three weeks, hobbling their pocket book and roster during some key bye weeks. 

Giveaway - Worst/Best Trade - PelicanBrief-GrossmanSachs (Manning-Helu for Romo/Ingram)

And an NFL Passing TD record

-About a day before Manning picked up five TDs in the opening game of the NFL season he was traded out of the Pelicans 3 QB draft strategy.  On paper, it seemed like a win for the Grishamites, they managed to convert two of their QBs into running backs.  RGIII was an injury risk and Peyton was bound to fall apart at his age.  Romo actually did respectably checking in as the sixth ranked QB by points (over 100 pts behind Manning), but it was struggles by the Grishamites chosen Brady checking in at 15th on the list behind both their other draft selections that makes this one sting.  Ingram's role in New Orleans' backfield never materialized either.

Honorable Mention - Goslings-Polk High Panthers (F-Jax for Jared Cook) -

Reading from the script in week 2 this didn't look too bad. F-Jax was just Spiller's older and less dynamic backup and Jared Cook was going to have a monster year with Sam Bradford. In hindsight, Spiller's balky ankle, F-Jax's vultures, and the high volume Buffalo running attack led F-Jax to be the 9th back by points.

Dollar General Super-Saver Award -

These guys should be back next year

Alshon Jefferies  (Grossman Sachs) $3
Knowshon Moreno (SanFranciscoFerries) $2
Antonio Brown (TakingTigerMountain) $5
Desean Jackson (TuskenRaiders) $7

Regular Season Coach of the Year - SanFranciscoFerries

This easily could have been a three-and-out year for the Boatmen, who started ominously by being to sole team unable to attend the auction draft in person. But the proxy did them right set an effective draft strategy.  Losing their first four, you could be forgiven for giving them up for dead in a 14 team league, but SFF rattled off nine straight wins to finish the season. When you lead the league in winning percentage a lot of things have to come together, like bargain draft picks (Moreno was the vulture of the year at $2) and offense leaders Bush, Lacy and Wilson all carved out premium seasons on a modest budget ($39,$22,$23), injury luck - Gronkowski returned to elite status to push the Ferries into the post-season, only to be struck down in their bye week, and waiver wire pick ups - Harry Douglas stepped into big wideout shoes in Atlanta. 

Rookie of the Year - The Goslings

2013 had two stellar rookies, but making the playoffs in your initial campaign is pretty impressive.  A seasoned veteran of other leagues the Goslings took a four game win streak into the playoffs, rounding out a stellar run. While they were the only team to take a negative point differential to the playoffs, they were consistent - scoring over 100 9/14 times and never scoring below 90 (or above 120).

Game of the Year - AEthernauts vs. Goslings Week 113.95 - 116.47

Recalc victories are always brutal but rarely are they so late in coming.  The Yahoo Recap still shows the Nauts taking this one by a point.  The Nauts went 4-3 to 3-4 on a Wednesday IDP reissue of Mathis' stats. It set in motion a chain of events that ended with the Goslings playing for the a playoff berth in the last game of the season despite ranking 10th in  points and the Nauts playing a lame duck game despite ranking fifth. 

Moral Victory / Tank for the Future Award - TakingTigerMountain

In the Middle of October the Commish announced Moral Victory - rewarding whichever non-playoff team finished with the most points in weeks 7-13 with extra draft dollars. Few would have expected TTM then 4-2, nearly 5-1 before their failed Quantum Point correction, to contend for this inauspicious honor. Yet contend they did. They ran through at 3-4, skillfully combining two 60+ point blowouts with two losses under 10 points. What did the TigerMountain Politburo see in the Ziggy's calculations that led them to this path? The league can only wonder. 

Comeback Kids - the Most Improved Award - Grossman Sachs 

At 6-7 in 2012 the g0dbank was relegated to spoiler in the playoff race, but they took to their new role as commish with a vengeance, making the playoffs while managing the league, casino and blog.  No easy feat, as this author knows.  Underachievers in the first half, the g0dbank had to win their last five to secure a bye, but few doubted they had the guns. A lethal combination of Peyton, Gordon and AP had them among the top point scorers all year long and they made it rain down the stretch, going over 120 in their last four games including a record shattering 205 in week 13.

Mid-Season Awards Watch *Updated

*Updated Edition

While the final Season Award Ceremony is still months away, we take a look at tentative bests of the 2014 season.  Things could change dramatically in the second half of the regular season, but this is how things stand as of the completion of Week 7.

Heisenburg's Maximum Titration Award - BldngDW3LL1NGTh1nk1ng (54 and counting)

Last year's BDT had 66 moves during the entire regular season to lead the league in number of transactions.  This year, they already have 54 at mid-point.  Their record has also improved, so the titration are frequent and spot-on, it seems.  In PSAS's five seasons, they lead the league in this category three times and was runner up (by only one transaction in 2012) in the other two years.  This one is the surest bet to stand until season's end.

Cashman's Biggest Purchase Award - The Old Future: Knile Davis ($66)

Jamaal Charles went down in the week TigerMtn dropped Davis, and the Rookie Time-warp pounced on the talented handcuff.  Hindsight is always crisp-clear, and we see that Knile spends much time on Future bench as Charles is back while not as dominant as years past.  The runner-up spending Asiata ($49 to TTM) isn't fairing much better, being eclipsed by a DivII Georgia Southern wishbone QB.  Last year's biggest purchase was at $87 for Brandon Jacobs in what was a hyper-inflated market.  This year's waivers is less bubblicious plus funds are starting to dwindle, so we'll see if any larger bid that could equal to BJ87 materializes in late season.

 

*Jay-Z's Biggest Spender Award - The Old Future, $140

Big pimpin' spending G's, or is it spreading cheez?  Before BDT took over as the leader after the triple-RB acquisition in Week 8, the Future lead the league in spendings mostly riding on the Davis acquisition and Torrey Smith's ($39).  They overloaded the waivers in these occasions, outbidding second highest bid by $25 in Davis's case and no one else putting in a claim for Torrey Smith's case. 

Best/Worst Trade - Polk High-PelicanBrief (Julio Jones/Fitz for Charles, week 1)

There really isn't a winner in this one of three trades that we've seen this year so far, and it may be why franchises are so gun-shy about making trades this season.  It's not really the trade of WR1-2 for RB1 that's questioned.  It's just that the two teams involved in this trade are at the bottom of the standingz at 1-6.  The other trades between contenders Nauts and BDT have the making of becoming the award-winner by the end of the year, depending on how the traded players and car salesman fair.  We probably haven't seen the last of trades in PSAS 2014.

*Best Draft - Phat Girlz

Honorable Mention: DraftBot version 20.1.4. for Dijonnaise All-Stars

As Arbiter commented, which inspired this category, the strength of Monique's season has its foundation on her laudable draft.  The Indy double-titration cannon of Luck for $22 and Hilton for $14 added to value keepers Tate ($3) and Garçon ($11) is the engine of this team.  Mix those with the right RB1 pick of Forte for $57 and WR1 pick of Cobb for $46, and you have a complete team.  For the DraftBot, the highlight includes Rivers for $4, Foster for $32 and Miller for $19. 

*Worst Draft Bust - Adrian Peterson for $68, TakingTigerMountain

Dishonorable Mention: LeSean McCoy ($58, Trichs), Montee Ball ($49, BDT), Zac Stacy ($39, Nauts), Keenan Allen ($37, Shock), Doug Martin ($36), Toby Gerhart ($32, BDT)

No one can be blamed for this, but the highest paid player in 2014 (=AP) logged a meager 9.3 points before being shut down for likely the rest of the season from the Switch-gate scandal.  Running backs are the easiest to break down by nature, but this year off-field issues have hit the position hard as well.  It's worth mentioning that, save for the Trichs and Shock, all teams that drafted above players are playoff contenders, which says something about those teams. 

MickyD's Dollar Menu Best $1 Spent in Draft Award - AEthernauts: Chris Ivory

 
Honorable mention: Cecil Shorts III (Pelican), Antonio Gates (Nauts), Reuben Randle, Steve Smith Sr. (Bloodz)

While contents are likeliest to be dropped from the roster with the click of a mouse, the dollar bin is full of gems every year.  Ivory is the mid-season favorite based on higher values workhorse RBs command, but SSS's performance is also worth mentioned.  Every body was hot on Ladarius Green in the pre-season, but Gates has held on to being the Rivers' Resurgence beneficiary.  We'll see how many of them will be the Best Keeper Value winner next summer.  This year's $1 keeper club includes Julius Thomas (Trichs), Joique Bell (Bloodz) and Cordarrelle Patterson (Nauts).

E-Trade Most Invested - Trichotillomaniacs: 13 bets

Last year's champs have seen many favorable odds in the market thanks to their own inability to win in 2014, and teams have tried to cash in hoping they'll eventually start winning.  The problem is exactly that lack of winning that created the favorable odds in the first place.  They've only won once, so only four of the thirteen bets have returned money for investors.  The front door to the Trichs office is widely shut of late to wade off protestors demanding their money back.  If they continue their losing ways, investor confidence will soon diminish.

Coach of the Year - Phat Girlz' Monique

Honorable mention: Dijon's Colonel Mustard, BDT's Hermodorus

Everyone knows Monique has the Girlz titrating at a very high level winning seven-straight, but the season's surprise is Colonel Mustard.  After trusting the DraftBots to construct his team while spending only 90% of the budget, Colonel has tweaked his lineups enough to have the sophomore team sitting comfortably in the chase for their first playoffs berth.  BDT's turnaround is also worth mentioning.

Game of the Year - Dijonnaise All-Stars vs TakingTigerMountain, week 7

While any of the four games in week 7 that was decided by less than 10 points as well as the Dijon's MNF win over Future the previous week are worth the consideration, Dijon-TTM had the most playoffs implication with both teams previously at 4-2.  If the outcome of any of the three Week 7 close games flips, that one jump to the top of the list.

Most Improved Team - Dijonnaise All-Stars

Honorable mention: BDT, Nauts, TigerMtn, Bloodz,

Sophomore slump is not in Colonel's dictionary.  He's gained more prowess on and off the field to manage a playoff-contending team in the first half of the season.  If memory serves correctly, Dijon also had a hot start last year but tapered off toward the end.  We'll see if Foster can stay healthy to carry the Mustards deep this year.  All teams honorably mentioned are in playoffs contention after missing the dance last year.  BDT and Nauts hold the handle, while TigerMtn and Bloodz still need statement wins.

*Rookie of the Year - The Old Future

This is the obvious/only choice.  The Futurists have struggled early on, losing several close and tough games en route to a 2-5 start.  Maybe rusts, maybe the unique culture of PSAS, probably both, Team Timewarp have shown enough fantasy prowess in waivers, casino and stock market for all of us to take note and pay respect.  They just need to make some kind of sacrifice to the g0dz so the g0dz would smile on them.

***We'll keep adding categories as I or anyone think of them.  Comments encouraged.  

Welcome to the PSAS Award Show! Introducing your host, Bob Knight!!

(rausing applause)

_______________

" If I were in charge I'd drug test all you sons of bitches, not just the athletes. "

Most Titrations in a Season:

BldgDw3ll1ngTh1nk1ng --> 68

2009. psych dog (62)

_______________

"A B.S. is just what it stands for. A M.S. is More of the Same. A PhD. Is

Piled Higher and Deeper."

Most Overspent on a Single Player

el mundo --> Brian Westbrook

_______________

"If you're a coach you're going to get your ass beat now and then"

Best Single Game for a Player

Grossman Sachs --? Mike Vick (Week 10 49 points)

________________

"All of us learn to write in second grade, and most of us go on to better
things."

Most Players Injured

Indianapolis Colts

_________________

If my reaction to the jeering from the stands on Tuesday night offended any
true Hoosier fans, I am deeply sorry and wish to apologize. I realize that
you have not always agreed with what I have done or said. I probably wouldn't agree with all you have said or did either

Best Free Agent Acquisition

Grossman Sachs --> Mike Vick; Silver Medal - BDT --> Peyton Hillis; Bronze Medal --> Brandon Lloyd Revenge of the Sith

______________

Greatest game of the Year

Week 7: EMP vs. Revenge 103.8-104

______________

"I've had all the challenges I need in my lifetime. I'd rather play against
a really bad team."

America's Team Award - team with greatest following

San Francisco Ferries

_______________

*** MAJOR AWARDS ***

The reason we lost the game was you, it was your fault.

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR AWARD - Best Expansion Franchise

2009: Discerning Nostrils

2010: Grossman Sachs

COACH OF THE YEAR AWARD- Best consistent week-to-week titrations

2009: Sunset Park Mastifs

2010: Phat Girlz

GENERAL MANAGER OF THE YEAR AWARD- Most successful acquisitions post-Draft

2009: psych dog

2010: BldgDw3ll1ngTh1nk1ng

1. Peyton Hillis FA signing for $0 (***** stars)

2. Miles Austin - Pierre Thomas trade (**** stars)

3. Ryan Fitzpatrick/John Kitna QB titrations after Tony Romo injury (*** stars)

4. Innovator of "Triple-Titration Offense" Romo + Miles Austin + Felix Jones (**** stars)

and finally...

Awarded for team that most lies in the pincers of the polemos, on the edge of Being (in-der-Welt-Sein) over the course of an entire career, while demonstrating Sportsmanship and High Achievement

INT'L NECRONAUTS