PSAS Chatbot

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

The Return of the Casino Gulag Games

GrossmanSachs proudly announces the return of the Casino Gulag Games! Time is short, so let's keep this brief. This week's games are FREE FREE FREE
I'm so excited to play these games that I can no longer walk!
Here's how this works. Two games will be played this week. The winner of each game will be awarded 15 bankerbucks to be used as you see fit on the waiver wire!

Both games are oldies but goodies, so let's start the games!

Teasing Stallion - This is awarded to player who gains the most yards (running + receiving, not returning) without scoring a touchdown. All you have to do is name a player, and if he has the most yards without a TD out of all the other players selected, you win 15 bankerbucks! In honor of Mike Alstott and John Kuhn, the OG TD Vultures who made Teasing Stallion possible, if you choose the winner, and a white guy on his team scored, you get an extra 5 bankerbucks!

Tackling Machine - Pick an individual defensive player who you think will record the most SOLO tackles this week. Whoever picks the player with the most SOLO tackles among those selected wins 15 bankerbucks! That's it! It's that simple! Why are you still reading this? Go do a tiny bit of goddamn research and get out there and win win win! Honestly, now I'm just adding some extra text so that the formatting next to this picture looks good! It's that easy!

To play, reply to this post, include your team name and you one offensive player pick for Teasing Stallion, and your one defensive player pick for Tackling Machine. All ties split the reward.

Last year's smash-hit PSAS Stock Market will return in week 4, as the bankers need a few weeks research time to set market prices.

18 comments:

  1. Alright, I'll go first...

    GrossmanSachs selects
    Teasing Stallion - The one, the only, Matt Forte (although I can't think of a white guy for possible bonus points. Sanzenbacher we need you back!)

    Tackling Machine - Lauranitis!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Let's go:

    Stephen S-JAX Jackson for Teasing Stallion. (Is Tony Gonzales white?)

    Chad "Neckface" Greenway for Tackle Machine

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Survey says.... http://lmgtfy.com/?q=is+tony+gonzalez+white+race

      One of his grandmothers is white. The rulez clearly state at least 50 percent caucasian blood is necessary for the Alstott-Kuhn bonus prize.

      Delete
  3. Trichotillomaniacs of the Far East picks:

    1) Ronnie Hillman
    2) Luke Kuechly

    ReplyDelete
  4. Spinning wheel of fortune says -

    Darren Sproles and Paul Posluszny

    ReplyDelete
  5. Polk HS

    TS:Eddie Lacy

    TM:Brandon Magee

    ReplyDelete
  6. Is it just me or was the winning amount changed from 20 to 15 bankerbucks. What is this the NJ state lottery??!?

    ReplyDelete
  7. 20 seemed like a lot. And, yes, this is the New Jersey State Lottery, no go pump my gas, SL@V3!

    ReplyDelete
  8. So if two people vote for the same guy what happens again?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Splitsky. You can change your vote up until 6pm Beastern since Shaun is unoriginal.

      Delete
  9. PhatGirlz (via email) pick CJ Spiller and JJ Watt

    ReplyDelete
  10. Didn't see that Greenway was already picked. Happy to cancel out my pick.

    Shaun

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll extend the deadline to Sunday morning if you want to change the Greenway pick.

      Delete