Grossman Sachs vs DOJ

Paul Joseph Watson

Infowars.com

October 17, 2000

(New York) It’s official, and I can’t say much of a surprise, the Department of Justice is investigating speculative fraud at Grossman Sachs. Alarms were set off last week, when after a precipitous downslide of Grossman stock, the Board of Directors bet against their own company’s stock price. Was there possible collusion between Grossman Sachs and The International Necronauts, the most direct beneficiary of their poor performance this past week?

(What is speculative trading or short selling? For more info please watch the incendiary Oliver Stone documentary Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps, copies can be found at www.oliverstonethinksurstupid.com, or you can email Mr. Stone directly at Oliver!@bohemiangrove.org)

(Grossman Sachs Board of Directors, from left: Medussa Rothschild, Vladamir Rockefeller, Cruella Vanderbilt, Adolf Sachs, Prescott Bush IV, and Rex Grossman)

The firm of Grossman Sachs has vehemently denied any wrongdoing, saying Rex Grossman is just a bad CEO, and certain shareholders were smart enough to know that. “We titrated the analytics is all,” said Sachs board member Mr. Chelsea Clinton. “We looked at the trends, ramdogged the numbers, gangbanged the derivatives, shot the moon, and ate the cereal and we did it all before breakfast. The numbers were all there, plain as day, just look at what Limbaugh said about the guy.” Mr. Clinton was referring to Rush Limbaugh’s comments in February 2007, when Limbaugh lambasted the press for intentionally trying to sabotage Grossman Sachs stock.

“I can't handle anymore press criticism of Rex Grossman. They're writing his name W-R-E-C-K-S…It's just -- they're focusing on this guy like they don't focus on anybody! They can't wait for this guy to fail… the guy's been targeted for destruction.”

So, is Limbaugh right? Was Grossman Sachs destroyed by design? We sat down with documentary filmmaker / bane of your girlfriend’s existence, Alex Jones. Mr. Jones has made 117 documentaries, 32 of which are on Rex Grossman.

“Look, we all know this guy’s a stooge, but just what kind of stooge is he? Cui bono if you will. I’ll tell you who it is, it’s the IMF, NWO, WWE, FEMA, VICKSKENNEL, MCI WORLDCOM, and it just goes on and on people. I’m just, it’s—I can’t tell you how much I hate these scum, we’re neck deep in a sea of collectivist technocratic bosshog shit and it’s getting in our lungs and compromising our precious bodily fluids.”

Jones could no longer speak as he was weeping uncontrollably into a burrito. We asked his cohort Webster Tarpley (star of the upcoming Ghostbusters movie in the coveted Bill Murray role) to elaborate. “It’s a group of extreme bankers and finance oligarchs. Their agenda is to kill the American economy, suck all the lifeless blood out of it, and then sell off the worthless carcass for top dollar to the el mundo pequeno, and they’re starting with Grossman Sachs.” Tarpley later added he’s available for speaking engagements and child birthday parties, for more info please see www.webstersbirthdayparties.com/thishasnothingtodowithemmanuellewis/tarpfun/.

While it may be months or even years before the Department of Justice can sift through the avalanche of evidence, there is little doubt that Grossman Sachs knows they’re being watched carefully now. The board of directors recently released a press statement containing the following: “It may seem hard to believe to our investors, employees, and slaves that we would somehow be administering our own destruction, apparently the concept is not too far fetched for the Department of Justice and rogue sites such as infowars.com to exploit for political gain. To our detractors we say eat our balls, and dying right here is strictly prohibited.”

Sadly French radio host Maximillion von Keiser was unavailable for comment, but his away message said “Grossman Sachs?! They’re arsonists! And their asking the Pre-Socratic All-Starz for more matches, and the PSAS is saying ‘Who do we make the check out to?” Destruction by design indeed.

******UPDATE*******

October 20th, 2010

This article was originally to be published a week ago, but do to myself, Mr. Jones, Mr. Tarpley and Mr. Limbaugh being considered persona non grata as contributors to For Here Too... the truth is only now seeing the light of day. We'll be keeping a close eye on this, and specifically the exclusionary tactics of Bu1ld1ingDw3ll1ngTh1nk1ng. Perhaps this was a deliberate effort to keep the heat off Grossman Sachs, and their seemingly deliberate destruction for one more week before their battle with Bu1ld1ingDw3ll1ngTh1nk1ng.

P.S. We're on the march, Grossman Sachs is on the run!